Minus Days

Yesterday Jezebel.com’s Dodal Stewart posted the brilliant article “Fuck You, Menstruation” as part of their brand new annual “Fuck You Week”. I cannot recommend this article strongly enough. Not only is it hilarious in the funny-because-it’s-true way, it is also long overdue. Because I so agree with this message:

We need to be allowed to talk about periods. Menstruation, like sneezing or sweating or erections, is a natural bodily function. But honestly? Sometimes women suffer in silence. Because for some ladies, to complain about your period is to participate in demeaning sexist clichés about being on the rag. She’s annoyed? Must be that time of the month. She’s crying? Probably surfing the crimson wave. As though menstruation, like an emotional tsunami, washes over the body and wipes out the real you. Maybe it does! For a couple of days! Or maybe it doesn’t! But we want to seem strong and capable, so we grit our teeth and pretend it doesn’t feel like a tiny rabid chihuahua is gnawing on the inside of our uterus. Fine. But fuck that. Fuck having your period.

And this one:

Women spend a shitload of time and energy trying to plug a hole in a dam that’s designed to burst. An unstoppable stream of vivid red, and we’re supposed to do gymnastics and party in a bikini like a tampon commercial? OMFG. Fucking bullshit.

Also, this:

The point is this: Yeah, it happens, yeah, it sucks, no, it doesn’t mean women can’t run shit, but FOR FUCK’S SAKE, CAN’T WE EXPRESS OUR DISPLEASURE WITHOUT BEING BELITTLED OR PATRONIZED OR THE OBJECTS OF BIAS?

And this is just beautiful:

And can we talk about how we jokingly call it Aunt Flo? As if it’s normal for a relative to wake you up in the middle of the night so you can find yourself lying in a pool of your own blood. As though permanently staining your underwear, sheets and mattress is something only your mother’s sister would do. FUCK THAT.

Where I come from, “minus days” is a recognized euphemism for menstruation. For that reason alone you ought to go read that article. Menstruation is not minus, it’s not nothing, it just sucks. But this article actually made me laugh about it, and that’s no small feat.

One response to “Minus Days

  1. We need to be allowed to talk about periods. Menstruation, like sneezing or sweating or erections, is a natural bodily function. But honestly? Sometimes women suffer in silence. Because for some ladies, to complain about your period is to participate in demeaning sexist clichés about being on the rag. She’s annoyed? Must be that time of the month. She’s crying? Probably surfing the crimson wave. As though menstruation, like an emotional tsunami, washes over the body and wipes out the real you. Maybe it does! For a couple of days! Or maybe it doesn’t! But we want to seem strong and capable, so we grit our teeth and pretend it doesn’t feel like a tiny rabid chihuahua is gnawing on the inside of our uterus. Fine. But fuck that. Fuck having your period.

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