(WARNING: Not for the faint of heart. I go to some pretty gangsta dinner parties, it would seem.)
Man: No, seriously, it’s true. If you feed the ducks it causes mass duck rape. Too many of the males are kept alive and they’ll get desperately aggressive during mating season and you’ll see hordes of males ganging up to pursue a single female duck.
Woman 1: He’s right. The biologists confirm it, and I’ve seen it, too. It’s really sad – they’re terrorizing the poor females.
Man: Yes, and often the rape is so brutal that the female will get killed during the act.
Woman 2: Well, at least that female duck dies happy then.
Everyone: !!!!!!!
Woman 2: What??
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Woman medical student: I don’t think blood or vomit is the worst thing you can get on you while working. For me it’s the grease from the autopsies. That happened to me the other day.
Man: The grease?
Woman medical student: Yeah, this grease that you put on the body you’re cutting open, to keep it fresh.
Man: So we’re talking corpse grease here? Oh, Christ… And how exactly does this get on you anyway?
Woman medical student: Well, sometimes you just get it on you, if you’re unlucky. And I was the other day – I was late for class, so all the good bodies were taken and they gave me the fattest one.


